Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
You pole danced in your parka.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Randomize
