yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
got weed?
I'm really tired of you accidentally texting me when your doing illegal things. I'm taking away your phone.
sorry mom...
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
Randomize
