Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
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