brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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