Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Randomize
