after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
I'm trying to think of how to explain to the dentist tomorrow that I think I pulled my jaw muscle eating pizza while drunk.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize
