There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Non-Jews are for practice
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
Never underestimate the power of titties
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
Randomize
