and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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