ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
I currently don't understand fingers.
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