its not stalking. its research.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize