White coat. Heels.
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
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