i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
I just want nice things and good sex
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
Randomize
