there were more penises there than on chat roulette
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
Next Halloween, remind me to find a different wingman. Walking out in your pirate costume talking like Captain Ahab while i was banging her and telling me I had to harpoon the white whale really pissed her off.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
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