so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
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