Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
Sorry my hands just texted you
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
