Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
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