I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Randomize
