I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
I believe in your delicious
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Randomize
