Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
Note to self. Never fart in a tanning bed
i can't believe i had my finger in that
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
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