Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
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