you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
Dude, seriously, fucking stop introducing me as "Thomas, with the dick piercing." you are the worst wingman ever.
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
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