arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Randomize
