How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
I will die if light touches me.
I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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