Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize
