We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
Randomize