We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Randomize
