I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
Randomize
