I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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