So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
