The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
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