alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
Sex in the backyard? Check.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
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