Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
Randomize
