I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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