The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
I forgot to tell you, that tinder guy literally lives 15 floors beneath me. I have been creepily saying things to him like "I see youve got a hammer on the patio"
Randomize
