It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
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