i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
