We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
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