she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
Randomize
