i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
Randomize
