oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Randomize
