dear santa what can i do with your candy cane?
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
