think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
