Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
Randomize