i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
This is classic penis vs brain.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize
