I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Randomize
