Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
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