Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
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