oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
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