i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
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