Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
Randomize
