I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
Randomize
