This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
Randomize